Is it Necessary to Send Thank You Cards for a Child’s Birthday Party?

by Emma W.R. on February 24, 2016


This has been an ongoing debate between me and my friends.  It seems that people feel strongly one way or another.  I get that times are changing and etiquette is falling by the wayside.   I do not expect to receive a thank you note after my child brings a gift to a party, but I do feel she should send one.  Notice I said, “She.”  I feel it is important to teach my daughter the importance of being grateful for everything she receives and for the people in her life.  We teach our children to say please and thank you, so why aren’t we teaching them to send thank you notes after receiving gifts at their birthday party?

I don’t think we need to actually ‘send’ the thank you note.  If my daughter is having a party for her friends, I have her write thank you cards beforehand.  As long as a child can write their name, they should at least add that to the bottom of the card.  When the kids are leaving, she hands out the cards herself along with a goodie bag.

If we are hosting a family party, I have her send out personalized thank you cards by mail.  If your child isn’t old enough to actually write the card, I suggest you write the card and have them add their name to the bottom.  Have her help put the stamps on so she is part of the process.


It always makes me feel like my gift is appreciated when I receive a thank you card.  I feel it is necessary to send thank you cards for a child’s birthday party, not only to show the attendee that they are appreciated but to teach your child to be thankful for those in her life.  As parents, it is important to incorporate teaching lessons in everyday life.  This is a perfect opportunity.

Please share your point of you.  I would love to hear what everyone out there is thinking.

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{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }

Linda June 20, 2016 at 10:37 am

Yes yes and yes! Train them when they are young. Respect, manners, common courtesy. So important to instill!


Abby May 23, 2016 at 1:21 pm

I agree with everyone else. it is never too early to teach good manners.


Carla May 9, 2016 at 2:40 pm

ABSOLUTELY! Teach kids manners and etiquette from day one.


Milly April 29, 2016 at 1:43 pm

The message doesn’t have to be long, but it is a great opportunity to teach your child manners and etiquette. It is never too young to get started in those lessons!


Christie April 6, 2016 at 10:28 am

It’s very important to send thank you cards to those that have gifted you something. Kids are very impressionable, teach them at a young age to appreciate what they were given, but teach them to give back as well. Being that my kids are young, they get very excited when mail comes for them even if it’s a simple thank you note from a friend!


Shanna March 30, 2016 at 10:01 am

When I was younger, I remember receiving thank you cards from big birthday celebrations, parties when the whole class was invited, something like that. It’s a friendly gesture to show appreciation, but I think it would be a bit overboard to expect one if it is just a small family gathering.


Marisol March 23, 2016 at 12:27 pm

Absolutely! Teach them manners at a young age. Good lesson.


Jane March 10, 2016 at 11:29 am

Not only is it the polite thing to do, but what child isn’t thrilled to get a note? Mine are always so excited to get those little white envelopes and I’ve seen other kids light up when they see they have ‘mail’. It’s a win-win 🙂


Dina March 7, 2016 at 2:09 pm

I honestly don’t love the trend of giving a generic thank you at the end of a party, but it beats not getting any thank you at all and still teaches kids important lessons in etiquette and appreciation.


Meg March 7, 2016 at 1:57 pm

I agree – a thank you note goes a long way. It’s how I was raised and I want to be sure my kids know how important it is to thank someone for doing something nice. A quick thank you and a personal comment like ‘I can’t wait to use my new…’ is all it takes to show someone’s thoughtfulness was appreciated.


Denise March 2, 2016 at 12:35 pm

I like the idea of having my son send out thank you cards but only if we are throwing a party where invitations were sent. If it’s an informal get together of family and a few friends I don’t think it’s necessary.


Lori February 29, 2016 at 9:17 am

This is a great way to start teaching your kids manners. Even when my kids couldn’t write I still had them sign their name to cards and taught them.


Eli February 26, 2016 at 4:17 pm

A thank you note is NEVER inappropriate. Better to send it and not worry than not send one and worry. Remember the expression: ‘You Never Go Wrong Doing The Right Thing’.


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